I know that you have spent the better part of your existence inside the womb and that the outside can be confusing, so allow me to give you a few pointers on how things work out here.
- When I swaddle you, it’s not for you to attempt Houdini-like escapes only to get pissed off when you’re unsuccessful (which, admittedly, doesn’t happen very often). In fact, it’s to help contain your Moro reflex so that you (and I) can sleep.
- Speaking of sleep, being rocked isn’t supposed to be an overstimulating activity that keeps you awake and a brightly lit living room with a toddler screaming (from joy or anger) and running around isn’t supposed to be conductive to sleep (though I’m certainly not going to complain that you manage to fall asleep in that environment).
- Nursing time isn’t supposed to be guzzle-down-my-milk-ASAP-and-then-proceed-to-spit-up-and-have-the-hiccups-for-15-minutes.
- When I put you up against my shoulder, it isn’t an invitation to work out you neck muscles. It’s to burp you so that we might skip the spitting up part of your nursing routine.
- Alternatively, the whole point of putting you on your tummy after diaper changes is
- By the way, you are allowed to poop in a wet diaper. Seriously, you really don’t have to wait until the moment where I have just finished swaddling you after changing your diaper to poop.
- I don’t mind that you prefer to sleep on your side or tummy and am happy to indulge your preferences during your daytime naps because I can keep an eye on you, but during the night, I would really, really like it if you could stay on your back.
There, I hope that clears up a few things for you.
Love you to bits,