Posted in Parenting

Wild Thing

I mentioned in a previous post that I don’t kill spiders (or other insects for that matter).  This means that we have a few resident eight-legged friends hanging around in the corners of some rooms of the house.  My children have grown, hum…accustom to them? fond of them?…I’m not quite sure which word would best describe their relationship to our household spiders.  Anyway, during each meal, Charles and Amélie look up at the junction between the ceiling and the walls of the dining room to find out which of the spiderweb hammock one of our resident arachnids is chilling in.

Usually, they find the spider and then go back to their meal.  This morning, however, something unexpected happened.  After spotting the resting spider, their attention was drawn to another spot on the ceiling.  I followed their gaze and saw a spider taking a leisurely stroll on the living room ceiling.  We watched it as it approached a helium-filled balloon and then, to their utter surprise, let itself fall to the ground.

With a sense of urgency in his voice, Charles immediately asked me where the spider was.  Now, if you think that it was because he was afraid of the spider, think again.  The simple fact is, he was concerned about its well-being.  I assured him that the spider was fine and then proceeded to place it inside an overturned glass bowl.  Charles came close to observe it and together we watched as it crawled inside the bowl.  We got a good look at its legs and pincers and abdomen.  Then, we brought it downstairs to relocate it to the garage.

As we were coming up the stairs, Charles’ boundless curiosity and scientific mind decided to hook up:

Mom, that spider was weird wasn’t it.  It was walking around instead of sleeping and hiding like all the other spiders.  Is it because it was a wild spider?

Haha!  I guess that means all of the other spiders in the house are pets?  Oh well, at least they’re low maintenance!

Posted in Parenting

Super Sassy

The Dada is giving the kiddos their bath tonight.  It’s always funny to hear the conversations that happen.

For instance:

The Dada: OK, it’s time to wash your hair guys.

Amélie: No, daddy, we’re not done playing yet.

The Dada: Hey, who’s the boss here?

Amélie [with certainty]: I am!!!!!!!

Posted in Parenting

Apparently, Beggars CAN be Choosers

An excerpt from this morning’s routine:

Charles: Mom, can you pick my clothes for me today?

Me: Sure thing!

I walk into his room and pull open his pants drawer.

Charles: Mom, can you pick my red pants please?

Me [chuckling]: OK sweetie, here you go.

I then make my way to his shirt drawer.

Charles: Can you pick a t-shirt?  I want to wear a hoodie today.

I look through his shirts and find his Pokémon t-shirt.

Charles: No, mom, not that one.  I want my blue t-shirt.

Me: I thought you wanted me to pick your clothing for today.

Charles: I do, but I want my blue t-shirt.

Posted in Parenting

Polar Bear Bellies

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I don’t know how things are at your house, but around here, Charles always seems to have his most important questions either when I’m on the toilet or driving.  A couple of days ago was no exception.

The conversation started out innocently enough.  Including Charles, there are five kids in his daycare.  He is the oldest and Amélie is the second youngest.  He was telling me that he was bigger than C, who is bigger than Amélie who is bigger than L who is bigger than A.  Now, given that I know that he likes his information to be precise, I decided to add that though his sister was bigger (taller) than L, she was younger than her (albeit only by a couple of months).

I.  Blew.  His.  Mind.

This brought upon a whole new realm of possibilities in his head.

“Is that true?!?”, he exclaimed.

“Yes”, I answered.

“Ok” [pause] “when will C (who is one year younger than he is) be older than me?”, he asked.

“She’ll never be older than you”, I replied.

Wait for it…

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“Why?” he asked.

Bam!

“Well, because when you a baby like Elliot, she was still in her mommy’s belly”, I explained.

Boom!  Mind blown.  Again.

“Mama polar bears can have babies in their bellies too, right?”, he checked

(because, of course, that was the only logical jump to make in the conversation)

“Yes”, I said

“And it’s just the woman polar bears who can have babies in their bellies, right?”, he questioned.

“Yup”, I answered

“And they need the dada polar bears to help them get a baby in their bellies, right?” he continued.

I wasn’t sure I liked where this conversation was going, but I answered anyways:

“Exactly”

“How did you and daddy make babies together?”, he asked.

“Well, um, we went in our room and closed the door”, I said, hoping it would be enough.

“Ok”, he said, apparently satisfied.

The Zootopia song Try Everything played in the background as he pondered what he had learned.  After a few minutes, he was ready to pursue his interrogation.

“How does the baby come out of the mommy’s belly?”, he wondered aloud

(Oh sh*t!)

“Well.  The baby grows inside an organ called the uterus.  When the baby is ready to come out, the uterus contracts and pushes the baby out”, I answered whilst crossing my fingers hoping he didn’t ask where the baby came out from.

He didn’t.

“Does it hurt?”, he asked instead

“Well, it doesn’t hurt the baby, but it can be a little painful for some mommies, sweetheart”, I replied.

“Ok”, he said, seemingly satisfied.

Woah!  These birds and the bees conversations are getting more and more intense each time we have them.  I can’t help but wonder when the next one will come up and which questions will be asked!

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Charles, master interrogator, comfortably seated in his favourite interrogation chamber.  Haha!

When did your kids start asking questions about pregnancy and birth?  How did you answer them?

Toddlers…

Snippet of the conversation going on between my 2 year old and my 4 year old yesterday as we were driving past the obviously train-less train station.

Amélie: Mom, is the train at the station?

Charles: No

Amélie [crying]: Mom, Charles said “no”!

Sheesh, the little peanut really doesn’t like the word “no”.

#mykiddosays Nov. 14th 2016

Remember that show: Kids Say the Darndest Things?  Well it turns out that they really do.  Sometimes, the littles in the house crack me up.  Let me share one of our more recent convos. with you.

Me:  So Charles, are you going to be a policeman when you grow up?

Charles: Nope.

Me: Ok then, what *are* you going to be?

Charles [matter-of-factly]: A superhero.

I feel safer already.

What has your kiddo said recently that has made you laugh?  Feel free to share in the comments or via Twitter with the hashtag #mykiddosays.